Feb 3, 2013; New Orleans, LA, USA; Baltimore Ravens wide receiver Jacoby Jones (12) dances in the end zone after his touchdown in Super Bowl XLVII at the Mercedes-Benz Superdome. Mandatory Credit: Jack Gruber-USA TODAY Sports

Ok guys, the time has come for us to have a talk.  I’d hoped that it wouldn’t have to be this way, but I’ve got no choice now.  NFL players have a frightening addiction.  It’s not anything they can eat, drink or inject, but rather an odd “hobby.”  That’s right, I’m talking about celebrity reality competition shows.

At first, it was innocuous enough.  Emmitt Smith and Jerry Rice turned in medal-stand performances on Dancing with the Stars.  That’s fine.  They’re former players just trying to keep the paychecks flowing and the fans fawning.

Then, a couple years ago, housewives across the country tugged on our replica jerseys to ask who Chad Ochocinco was as he appeared in sequined garb on the show.  Ochocinco, who was trying to maintain NFL relevance, was wasting time mugging for the cameras as he twirled a couple months of his prime into the gutter.  We thought Chad’s entry was an outlier; he had his own Bachelor knock off show for crying out loud.  But no, as Donald Driver proved last year, current NFL players are getting in on the bit as well.

Last night, it was revealed that Jacoby Jones, he the fortunate receiver of several Joe Flacco arm-punts this past season, will appear on the next season of Dancing with the Stars.  Jones showed his moves celebrating in the end zone in the Super Bowl, but that’s after an amazing catch and run for a touchdown, not after zipping into a silk onesie.

It’s not even the unmanliness of the thing that gets me, it’s the fact that these guys are still trying to make a much more lucrative existence in a sport that demands peak health.  It’s only a matter of time before one of these guys pulls something in dance practice, leaving him on the sideline for their NFL gig and engendering the chagrin of the fans, media and teammates.  Hopefully that doesn’t happen, but it seems like these guys are setting themselves up for an unnecessary risk.

Speaking of unnecessary risk, dancing isn’t even the most dangerous reality endeavor being attempted by an NFL player this offseason.  Ndamukong Suh will be appearing in the celebrity diving show “Splash” in a matter of weeks.  The premise is simple: Celebrities train with professional divers and then do individual dives for a panel of judges.  This idea sounds fine for, say, a guy like Tony Siragusa or Jerome Bettis (not actual competitors, just examples), but for a Pro Bowl caliber defensive tackle still in the league, it just seems dicey.

If the concept of the show isn’t enough of a red flag, there’s this.  Suh and diving coach Greg Louganis (he of the concussion received from a diving board) rescued Louie Anderson from drowning during a recent practice.  I’m going to go out on a limb and guess that Suh is probably in better shape than Anderson, but the fact that somebody is having to be rescued should give Lions fans a bit of pause.

One thing we can take away from Suh’s foray into lifeguarding is this: maybe the bench press isn’t the most effective way to gauge college graduates’ strength at the combine.  Perhaps, instead of how many reps a player can knock out on the bench, they should test how many times they can hoist Louie Anderson out of a pool.  At least the, it would make for great TV, and that’s what it’s all about right?

Feb 3, 2013; New Orleans, LA, USA; Super Bowl MVP Joe Flacco raises the Vince Lombardi Trophy after winning Super Bowl XLVII at the Mercedes-Benz Superdome. Mandatory Credit: Chuck Cook-USA TODAY Sports

Is Joe Flacco an “elite” quarterback?

By turning down a contract extension in the offseason, Baltimore Ravens quarterback Joe Flacco took a huge gamble on himself going into the 2012-2013 NFL season.  That gamble looks like it will pay off handsomely. One Lombardi trophy and Super Bowl MVP award later, and it appears some team out there is going to pay elite-level money for the five-year vet.  The question that remains, however, is whether Flacco is truly a top-tier quarterback?  Mike Dyce and Justin Bitner take to the table to discuss one of the offseason’s hottest topics.

JB: When I think of an elite quarterback, I envision a guy who can take a team on his back and will them to a victory.  A guy who, when given the ball on the final drive and a touchdown or less deficit, strikes fear in the bones of his opponent.  This man must exhibit consistent excellence and be considered the face of the team.  Joe Flacco is not that guy.  He is a really good quarterback, just like Tony Romo or Matt Ryan or even Philip Rivers, but he’s not an upper-level quarterback.

MD: Joe Flacco is absolutely an elite quarterback. He beat Andrew Luck at home, and if he has the career people project will be a future Hall of Famer, then he went on the road, and beat two sure-fire, first ballot Hall of Famers in Peyton Manning and Tom Brady. You could argue that he beat the two best or at the very least 2 of the Top 5 NFL quarterbacks in history. And he did it while throwing 11 TDs, and 0 interceptions, a feat that has never been done in 4 consecutive post season games. As far as face of the franchise, he is inheriting that throne from Ray Lewis as we speak. Next season, Joe Flacco is the face of the organization. And Tony Romo essentially did the same thing as Flacco with his contract extension by waiting to sign after the season. But only one delivered and won on that gamble, that makes him different. That makes him “elite.”

JB: It’s very fair to say that Joe Flacco had an “elite” 2012 postseason, I just wouldn’t say that overall he can maintain that level of play over the long haul.  He’s been a good quarterback with a great defense for the first five years of his career, and he has performed very well.  No quarterback in history has won a playoff game in each of his first five seasons, so he certainly deserves credit there.  However, this postseason aside, he’s been far from dominant from a QB rating standpoint, with an average rating of 66 (a number exceeded by Mark Sanchez’s 2012 regular season clunkfest) prior to this year’s breakout.  This year was great, but with a defense that’s about to be decimated by attrition in the next few years, Flacco won’t have the supporting cast to make him look better than he really is.  As for him beating quarterbacks head-on, I’d contend that the Denver win was more a product of Rahim Moore making an awful play on Jacoby Jones than Flacco slicing and dicing the Bronco D.  Luck is a rookie, so there’s that caveat.  The Patriots win was quality, but it would never have happened without the win at Mile High.

MD: Joe Flacco has started all 16 games in all 5 seasons of his NFL Career having never missed a game in his career. That new Brett Favre like Iron Man streak is enough to have him in a different elite class than the average quarterback. He has only had one season with less than 10 wins, a 9-7 season. He has never had a losing season and a career record of 54 wins and 26 losses. He has a career 60.5% completion, 102 career touchdowns, and 17,633 yards. Oh and only 56 interceptions. Peyton Manning also started every game in the first 5 years of career but had 2 losing seasons, 42-38 overall. He completed 62.1% of his passes for 20,618 yards, 128 TDs and a more staggering 100 interceptions. Tom Brady by comparison had a 58-20 record, 61.9% completion, and 123 TDs/66 Ints in his first 5 seasons as a starter. Joe Montana had a record of 28-21 with a completion percentage of 63.5, 11,979 yards 78 TDs, and 44 INTs in his first 5 seasons. He didn’t play as much as Flacco though, only starting 49 games. So Flacco seems like he is right on par with elite quarterbacks and all time greats at this point in his career.

JB: Let’s roll with that stats argument for a moment.  I’m going to give you three more quarterbacks with commensurate stats over their first five seasons in the starting role:

Player A: 60.52% completion, 13,955 yards, 97 TDs/59 INTs

Player B: 64.36% completion, 18,598 yards, 129 TDs/74 INTs

Player C: 63.68% completion, 19,513 yards, 135 TDs/57 INTs

The three quarter backs? Jake Delhomme, Daunte Culpepper and Philip Rivers.  Stats can be misleading at times, and it leads me back to my belief that Flacco is a really good quarterback.  In their primes, Delhomme, Culpepper and Rivers were really good as well; the giant difference was their surrounding pieces.  Flacco has the benefit of playing on a team that has Hall of Fame players at multiple positions on defense and some really nice pieces on offense.  Joe is skilled enough to manage the offense with enough competent flair to put him above the level of a Trent Dilfer, but he just doesn’t seem to have the killer instinct that Brady and the others have.  It may be an intangible quality, but the best way I can think of to quantify it is this: If your favorite team had to face either Brady or Flacco in the playoffs, who do you want?

MD: I think you could argue that your three quarterbacks had better pieces than Joe Flacco during this run. Delhomme had Steve Smith at wide receiver, and Muhsin Muhammad, not to mention Stephen Davis. Daunte Culpepper had arguably the best wide receiving corp in history at one point. That dynamic duo consisted of Cris Carter, who just found out he is entering the hall of fame and many think was a top 10 receiver all time, and Randy Moss, some of whom think will go down in history as the second best wide receiver of all time. And Phillip Rivers had an all time great in Ladanian Tomlinson, Antonio Gates, and Vincent Jackson. Who has Flacco had? Ray Rice? Torrey Smith, and a over the hill 32 year old Anquan Boldin? Flacco benefits from a better defense maybe than the the quarterbacks you mentioned though Delhomme had Julius Peppers. Joe Flacco might not be Tom Brady, but he is definitely no game manager like Trent Dilfer and Alex Smith.

The jury is still out on this one so feel free to vote in the poll below, and explain why you cast your ballot the way you did in the comments below.

Nov 22, 2012; Arlington, TX, USA; Cy Ditmore grills turkeys at his tailgating party on Thanksgiving prior to the game with the Dallas Cowboys playing against the Washington Redskins at Cowboys Stadium. Mandatory Credit: Matthew Emmons-USA TODAY Sports

The football season has officially ended.  No matter what team you root for, the worst 182 days of an NFL fan’s year is commencing as you read.  No more Mondays, Thursdays and Saturdays spent glued to the television, ignoring everyone around you.  No more hurried fantasy roster changes as your boss passes by your cubicle.  It’s time to get back to reality.  Doing housework, making grocery runs and speaking to your wife are only tiny spokes of the wheel of change that’s been set in motion.

What can you do?  How can you prolong this blissful disconnect until the preseason kicks back up on August 5th? Here are some key dates and hobbies you can pick up during the offseason to take on that NFL hangover like a champ.

Study up for the NFL Draft (80 days down, 102 to go) – With hundreds of players eligible for the draft every year, there is a greater than zero chance that you haven’t heard of ninety percent of them.  In order to be prepped for draft day, take a dip in the informational pool that is YouTube and do some background work.  The next great sixth-round steal is lurking in there somewhere.  With all your research done ahead of time, you’ll be able to sound somewhat educated when you scream at your team’s GM for blowing another first round pick on a wideout who thinks Wonderlic is a brand of popsicles.

Barricade yourself during the Draft April 25-27 (3 days down, 99 to go) – These three days are where the champions are built.  Forget about practice, the teams that do their homework and draft quality players are the ones who succeed long term.  A good front office makes everyone else look good.  Think of how awesome you’ll feel in a few months when you tell your friends “I knew Jonathan Franklin was a steal in the fifth round.”

Check your power situation (7 days down, 92 to go) – We need only look to the Super Bowl to see what can happen when you’ve got too many cords plugged in to the old power strip.  Take some time to get acquainted with your pad’s electrical system, maybe even call a pro over to make sure you don’t have any questionable connections.  You don’t want to be watching that key 4^th quarter drive in Week 13 only to have a shoddy wire connection knock out your signal.

Reassess your home theater experience (14 days down, 78 to go) – Since you’ve already gone through the pain of looking at your wires, take a look at that old TV you’ve got.  If you’re the type to upgrade your flat screen every other year, then chances are you’re in good shape.  But if the Buffalo Bills have been in a playoff game since you last bought a TV, it’s time to change that.  With new Ultra HD and OLED sets hitting the market soon, you should be able to pick up an aging LED or Plasma for a song.

Take a weekend trip to Canton (3 days down, 75 to go) – Get leg-up on the crowds and visit the Hall of Fame during the summer.  Sure, you won’t be able to see the shiny batch of new busts, but at least you’ll be able avoid having some giddy Ravens fan breathing on your neck as you try to read Jonathan Ogden’s bronzed bio.

Commence Fantasy Football research (30 days down, 45 to go) – Tied of seeing your fantasy football league fees go right to your co-worker’s kids’ Christmas presents?  Take the pot this year by doing some deep fantasy research.  Find out which defense looks to be the most ball-hawky next season or which team’s kicker is going to become the next phantom point factory.  With a little brainwork up front and some lucky breaks, you could be the one treating your family to a sweet vacation this Christmas…or you could just beef up your scotch cabinet.

Spend some time with your family (20 days down, 25 to go) – You know that feeling.  You’re watching your team on Sunday, and the left side of your face starts to get warm.  You slightly rotate your head and your gaze sets on your wife, arms folding with that laser gaze dead-set on your cranium.  Your kids are tugging on your lucky jersey like a dog on the mailman’s leg.  Put a little coin in the patience meter by treating the family to a little quality time with their patriarch.  Add video games and jewelry for bonus points.

Master the art of the tailgate (7 days down, 18 to go) – On a scale from one to delicious, how well can you smoke a brisket?  Are you going with sausage links or brats?  These are questions that demand to be answered!  You don’t want to be the guy in the parking lot spraying lighter fluid on dead coals like a dog marking his favorite stump.

Tune out football to clear your mind (11 days down, 7 to go) – Athletes who compete in any kind of endurance sport are familiar with this concept, it’s called tapering.  You reduce the amount of exercise you do ahead of a big race or meet so that your muscles are primed and ready to go.  For a football fan, you’ll want to get your mind right for the coming season, as you don’t want to get halfway through the season and forget who your team’s backup long snapper is.  All that hard work you put in building credibility will be thrown out the window.

Attend a Training Camp July 29th to August 5th (7 days down, 0 to go) – Get familiar with the new faces on the roster by seeing their development first-hand.  If you’re lucky, your team’s training camp site doubles as a great vacation getaway.  If you’re a Lions fan, well, maybe visit another team’s camp.

And there you have it, 182 days worth of activities to get you through the offseason.  Before you know it, you’ll be watching your favorite reserves play for their careers in those riveting preseason matchups.  Hydrate, stretch and don’t overload your circuit breaker and you should be just fine.