Brian Urlacher – I don’t have a desire to play. I’m not in shape.

Dec. 23, 2012; Glendale, AZ, USA: Chicago Bears defensive end Julius Peppers (90) and linebacker Brian Urlacher against the Arizona Cardinals at University of Phoenix Stadium. The Bears defeated the Cardinals 28-13. Mandatory Credit: Mark J. Rebilas-USA TODAY Sports

Former Chicago Bears linebacker Brian Urlacher called it quits. He had a little thread of hope to put on the pads earlier in the offseason, but now that he has called it quits, he has no desire to play the game.

“My agent … went through every scenario, what if so-and-so calls? What if they offer me $10 million?” Urlacher said Friday via the Chicago Tribune. “I don’t want to play. I don’t have a desire to play. I’m not in shape. I haven’t been doing football stuff. I’m sure I’ll miss it when it’s time to put the pads on and stuff. But I won’t miss how my body feels when I’m done.” – NFL.com

He is ready for the rest. He is ready to settle down. He is ready to work on that golf game.

He doesn’t even seem interested in joining television and being an analyst. Coaching doesn’t appeal him because of the long hours. He is ready to just ride into the sunset and everyone remember him as a legend on the gridiron.

Time to pull out those Cheetos and kick it in front of the TV. Retirement is here. Maybe I am the only one that envisions retirement that way.