Making claims of guaranteed wins (or losses) before any given week of the NFL season is anything but a foolish exercise, right?
You're never going to get nasty emails when you make bold claims like this. But this is the bed we've made, and we're going to lie in it for better or worse. It's Week 3 of the 2024 NFL season and we've got plenty of convictions about which teams are going to come away victorious.
In fact, I've already picked the full slate of games for Week 3, and heading into Sunday, I'm feeling good about a 1-0 start. With that in mind, who are our guaranteed winners for Week 3 that are sure to make us look good and not have any fan base dunking on us when the week is over?
3 guaranteed winners in Week 3 of the 2024 NFL season
1. Cincinnati Bengals (home game vs. Commanders)
Lou Scataglia picked his guaranteed losers for Week 3 of the 2024 season and had the Washington Commanders on the list. Maybe the fact that he had the Commanders as a guaranteed loss and I've got the Bengals as a guaranteed win is not exactly the best sign.
But the Bengals starting off 0-3 would be downright shocking, maybe the biggest shock of the 2024 season to this point. I just don't see any way that happens with how good the Bengals' defense is and how slowly the Commanders' offense is coming along under 2nd overall pick Jayden Daniels and coordinator Kliff Kingsbury.
I'd be riding with the Bengals for sure in the Monday nightcap.
2. Seattle Seahawks (home game vs. Dolphins)
The Seattle Seahawks have a few really big advantages going into this weekend's game against their third straight AFC opponent to start the 2024 season.
First, the Seahawks playing at home with a 2-0 record is always a major advantage. Second, the Dolphins are being forced to start young Skylar Thompson in place of the recovering Tua Tagovailoa, who is on IR with a concussion. Third, Seattle's defense has been flat-out dominant vs. the pass this season.
It's the battle between Mike McDaniel and Mike Macdonald in Seattle this weekend, but I'm pretty certain of the Seahawks pulling off a win barring something surprising.
3. Los Angeles Rams (home game vs. 49ers)
This is always going to be a tough matchup between division rivals, but I'm very confident in the 49ers pulling out a road victory this weekend given how banged up the Los Angeles Rams have been.
It's been a brutal couple of weeks of injury news for the Rams, who are going to be down both Cooper Kupp and Puca Nacua among other players, but the 49ers are arguably even more down bad for this game.
The 49ers won't have Christian McCaffrey, Deebo Samuel, or George Kittle (doubtful) against the Rams and I think this is a game in which we're going to see Matthew Stafford simply prove his veteran ability over someone like Brock Purdy, who made some really rough throws in last week's loss to the Vikings.
This is a bold projection because the 49ers are favored by 6.5 points in this game, but that might be a bit of a foolishly large line when all is said and done.